Superheroes in Action

im happy my work is over
absolutely hysterical that i have my well-deserved stress-free moments now!
weeee....
but then i still find myself getting into fumble situations.
i hardly have time for myself? hah.
i wonder...

this job is definately tiring especially when you're a superhero..
im not an impersonator thank you..
after all..
'character is what one is..but reputation is what one is thought to be by others'
but still..one can be both right??
im speaking for myself..hehe

cuz im tired of saving the world on my own..
you know..a saviour's saviour?
thats why i have my newest super sidekick to fight evil villians!! hah.
supergirl!!

the last day...

im definately not okay rite at the moment.

there's this portion of me feeling hysterical at leaving..
weeeee....^%$!*$#%&
after almost 6 months..it does feel great.
its like this shoulders of mine was just given a good tense rub from an angel..!! hehe
and to have that amazing sense of achievement after long hiatus...?
its just plesurizing every second of it...!

still..a part of me doesnt want to end..
i feel as if i dont intend to go back to school.

a friend was actualli wondering why..
i told her im gonna miss the werking life.
im gonna miss waking up early in the morning..
and to come back home, to know you are too dead tired to do anything else.
that sounds awful.
but it is an inevitable picture of your future aint it?
i do want to work.
i want to have responsibilities.
i want to face the world realising that i have an important job at hand.
i want grow up and be a part of something great..
where risk and challenges are just the small problems of a big jigsaw puzzle..
a life's puzzle.
i want to leave that childish carefree attitude behind that has instilled me for the last 20 years.
i want to say goodbye to that.
im trying.

reality scares.
tomorows analytical. probably still predictable.
but the future bewilders more than anyone can apprehend..

my priorities have changed.
its the people around whom ive affected most.
i hope they'll understand.

...identity crysiz...

sometimes i feel as if i have an identity crisis at hand..
the face which potrays the common character within?
its no longer there.
its used to be me, myself and i.

nowdays its like im a cute guy, im a charming guy and definately an exquisite guy.
hahaha..lol!

pardon me.
im stressed out!
=P

...insomnia...

i got a friendly gesture from someone few days back.
its not that i prefer my inner side to get swayed by sappy sadness..
nor getting myself drenched in feelings and venting it out till these eyes cried blood. haha.
realising im too "emo" for that matter.

im probably suffering of insomnia. am i?

and i got a chatterbox!
how odd can things be.
convinced!
sleep deprived has made me this way..
it makes me happy though.

ashamed..

probably the most simplest verb to define your actions.
there's others like coward, insensitive, inconsiderate, mindless..
the list could go on and on to describe people like you..
and nope..this post is not at all a critisizm of any sort.
nor an attack on the very fact of anger.
i very well don't pleasurize in these foolish acts.

probably you have lived life to the fullest..
probably you're some wise mortal who proclaimed to know everything.
probably you amuse yourself by ruining people's lives..
probably..
but absolutely you are just another bitch.
cause i find you worse that a critic columnist.
maby you can find a career as a paparazzi instead..hah
save your sarcasm.
build your humane sanity.

so i guessed you should be ashamed..
ashamed of the false accusations you have unrightfully did.
please..
just let me advise you..
salvage that small amount of dignity and pride you still have in you..
save it for its own when you look upon that mirror of yours.
cause the last thing you need right now..
is to fall in deep sin everytime you mutter discrimination.

im surprize you pity us..
cause that is not a true prejudice.
thanks but no thanks. you need it more than we do.

Now..give me hope..

Discontented.
I am definitely not in any state of euphoria now.
Disregard.
I certainly had no consideration for things I said which Ive said.
Sick.
It just has to happen at the most terrible of times.

Sometimes I find myself in a position making irrational decisions without prior thought.
It sure does happen to all of us before I understand.
But as of lately, things have gone wrong
Just occurring over once too many I guess.
The aftermath really does hurts.
As of now, I cant help myself feeling that sulky sorrow.

And yes I do.
I do fall sick often.
I do know when this happens; I tend to make hasty acts.
And I do know that I will try its best not to affect the people around me.
But yet again, I do realize that its not a reason for the way I have been now.

I cant be mindful of the things I do.
I cant make a wise stance.
And I cant help trying to be Mr. Right and not jeopardize the feelings of others.
Cause at the end of the day, I impulsively hurt the one closest to me.

Now you lost all faith
I have lost confidence.
Are you still willing to forgive me?

give me hope...

some people can create such bombastic words when they lay their fingers on the keyboard..
but pity they get dumb when ask to talk..
tsk3..
makes me question their intellect...
cum' on..
get real..

the best friend was really funny yesterday..
were talking about questions with riduculous answers..haha
its when you ask someone a high-end qn. and expecting a wise decent ans. back,
but it just came out unbelievable?
a reply which can make someone go.."ya rite..whatever" but which in fact IS true..!! hehe
i really had a good laugh..
but details..i cant spill..
cuz its sinful in its own way...hehe
shhh...

i almost forgot..
its my sidekick's superheroin birthday yesterday..
ze Wonderwoman..heh
HAPPY 22nd BIRTHDAY YANTY!!!
hah

anyways i just overheard the radio saying some president somewhere
in some country has his own personal blog..hehe
if people like him do own them..
then i would lurve to read some celeb's blogs or even nicer..Pornstars!!
haha..those hardcore errotic rants..
like normal vain people..words are just not enough to express themselves aite..
they might include to put some pics as well..haha
*steamy*

and no im not deprived thank you..=P

sometimes i find myself stucked in a moment i dont wanna get out of..
when everything seem so perfect..
where everything falls in place..
thats the time i feel just like a movie star..haha

movies are fictionous..
probably the stories of someone's fantasies..
yup..movies are just one's dreams..
its the desire and imaginations in every single one of us to be someone else..apart from our tragic lives...
on any other day..
i would die to be a superhero in an action pack setting..hehe..
but now...
i'll probably be a lovable character in a romantic seductive backstabbing plot..hehe
the thing is..when reality sets in..
and when sneak previews are gone..
when the curtain closes in from the big stage..
it is then they'll find out...
that movies are just one big pretentious lie..
its true from the start..movies are faked..
reality is one's life..

times change..
things change..
people change..
but this life of mine has turn on a drastic change which i love to accept..
but probably not others..
i know im stucked..but i dont want it to end either..
cuz my reality is my dreams..
and the movie..is my life now..

as of this moment..this is how i'll act in my movie..

************************************************************
weee....
national day!!
sooooo........

Let us salute...!!

to the upside down singapore flag?! =/
hahahaha...!!

privacy has never been at my top priority.
until recent events which kinda instill this doubtous feeling for the ones i truly had relied on.
its not a question of lifelong bonds uncertainty,
i know im not going that far..
cuz sometimes there is a line of trust and concelameant that you wouldnt wanna cross.
pardon me..
but you should have known well enough what you cant and which you dont.

im not putting any blame nor do i resolve in any audacious decision-making.
after all..we are in fact humans..
suspicion and curiosity are just part of our natural instincts.
but still..we are able to override the urge dont we??
bottomline..no hard feelings alright

and i am sooo looking foward to something** tonight..
happy.happy.
hehe..
the only way i can miss you is being so close to you but knowing i cant have you*

its been some time since i stepped back into poly..
i did yesterday..
and it all flashback right again..

the hectic moments..with a carefree life..
those hot headed teachers..blend with the hottie chickies in canteen 1..hehe
these fashion sense people (i salute)..and those who has nothing better to do with their hair..=P
the cold lecture room..with desks that was as cozy as your bed..
and lectures that sung lullabies to your ears..

its the place where going to school are a mandatory..
but attending lectures are prolly well . . . decided according to your moods..
dont feel like it..then dont go..haha =P
or worse still..
"the teacher sux lahz..dowan go lahz.."
that has always been my case.

amidst that..friends are the source of motivation..
for the bad..and bad-er..hehe
forget all about how the school braggg on and on about us to be "independant" and "self-reliant"
cuz at the end of the day..u find yourself chilling out in the canteen,
being damn late for tutorial,
but still figuring out whether to go or not to go??
and friends are there to encourage your evil side personality to just take it easy braderrr..haha
"eh..boring ar..we all go play pool ar want?"

well..im just there going with the flow..

and i had a lecturer once who scold the blardy shit out of me just because i pass her exam..
instead..she had wanted me to fail!
hehe..how things can get so much ridiculous?

weeee..i miss those times..**

and someone was on cloud 9 yesterday..hehe
the other one..
jumping on his twinkie toes..
and smiled frantically to himself..all the way back home..haha